Partner Wanted: Pulse Preferred

An Edinburgh journalist is among four hacks to have won themselves three months free membership of an internet dating website, courtesy of a description of his ideal partner that she 'preferably has a pulse'.

The journalist – whose name is being kept secret – was taking part in a competition organised by, which asked for the funniest contact detail entries. As it happened, the top four entries were all penned by journalists: two from London and one from Newcastle, as well as the one from Edinburgh.

According to the Edinburgh journalist, his ideal partner is: “Something female. Pulse preferable.  Hair length unimportant – though the majority of it should be on the scalp. Good-looking, and well-rounded (academically, and otherwise).”

And he describes himself, thus: “A hack, living just outside Edinburgh. Married for 10 years to a wife who communicates by hoovering around me and tutting. I enjoy good books, the work of David Lynch, and the occasional folk hoedown. My friends would describe me as kind and a little bit unhinged. In all seriousness, the spark has gone from my current relationship, and I want to reignite it…hopefully with a lady in a similar situation.”

And he further describes himself: “The sexiest damned media professional you have ever seen in your life. 5ft 9, shiny grey locks, and flat feet to die for.”

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